PROFESSIONAL QUALITY GOOD FUN ACHIEVEMENTS

TIMELY, SCHMIMELY

Back when orange skies (from Canadian wildfires) coincided with an indictment of a certain orange-faced ex-president, I submitted this cartoon to a certain timely cartoon venue.

18 days later, they officially rejected it.

It's not exactly timely at this point.

WHEN YOU'RE READY TO MOVE BEYOND TALKING ABOUT SOUP

Don't get me wrong: discussing soup with my artificial girlfriend has been more fun than I can describe, but I think I may be ready to bump things up by another 83 levels.

FADED GLORY

RED MOON, LAVENDER SUN

TONIGHT ON TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES

GHOST GAL AT SEA

GHOST BABE

FAKE GUITAR PLAYERS

Lorna Patterson.

BAD HAIR HALL OF FAME

Boris Karloff.

STRANGE BEDFELLOWS

Charlie McCarthy and Marilyn Monroe.

WALL STREET JOURNAL CARTOON 3

WAL STREET JOURNAL CARTOON 2

WALL STREET JOURNAL CARTOON 1

HAT HALL OF FAME.

Charlton Heston.

CURATED CARTOONS

GIVE ME A WINE YOU CAN CUT WITH A KNIFE

DUBIOUS DOG

MORLOCK BABE

POLKA DOT MONSTERS

FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS

HELMET HAIR

GRAMMAR POLICE: AN INTERNAL INVESTIGATION

How ironic that a sales update on a cartoon about bad grammar contains bad grammar.

FROM THE MIND OF BARNEY FIFE TO THE SHELVES OF AMAZON

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER EMAIL FRAUDSTER

How considerate of Brian Smith of Fedex (or is it the Post Office?) to risk going to jail so that I can send him some money for a nonexistent package.

SHINY OBJECT ALERT

FIORELLO LAGUARDIA WOULD BE PLEASED

MUM'S THE WORD

THE TUCKY FAMILY'S FAVORITE SON

DAPPER IN DEATH

NONPLUSSERY PERSONIFIED

HEIDI WHOLESOME

SEPARATED AT PUBERTY 3

Jonathan Banks and Yevgeny Prigozhin.

SEPARATED AT PUBERTY 2

Conan O'Brien and Glenn Close.

SEPARATED AT PUBERRTY 1

The Museum of Natural History and Planet of the Apes.

ASKEW, JUST FOR YOU

OLD SELF-PORTAIT

BORN TO THE PURPLE

AUTHORITARIAN, BUT GROOVY

RADIOACTIVE RHONDA

MY BIOPIC

PACHYDERMOPHOBIA